An Excerpt from Cocktail!

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“What do you want, Prachi? Haven’t you done enough?” Neel asked holding back all the irritation.

“I want the same thing you want, Neel – go back in time, fix the past, and get someone back I had lost – you and restart a whole new life without bad things following us,” she said and sat there gazing at him for longer than usual. There was something in the air that made her turn back and look at their broken relationship.

“You’ve got to listen to me. I want to apologize for –”

“What? You think I will forgive you after all that?” Neel cut her off rudely.

“Give me a chance,” she pleaded.

 “Everyone, whom I lost, is because of you. It was you, who ditched me for another guy. It was you, who slept around when you were in a relationship with me. And you expect me to get back with you?” Neel said with a frown and started looking here and there, as if, he was desperately searching for an escape.

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“Okay. Apologize and you better make it quick,” said Neel, looking into her eye.

For a minute, she just stared at Neel, speechless, looking utterly stupid, and said nothing.

 “Justified, I agree with everything what you just said. I know I did it. I ripped you apart. I broke your trust into pieces, which can never be put together again, but I regret every ounce of the pain I gave you. I really do and I’m sorry for that,” she agreed to all the mistakes she had done and tried to hold his hand asking for his forgiveness. He jerked her hand off. The tears would run anytime now. But she was doing a gargantuan job of holding them back.

“Please go now. You have done enough damage already and I don’t want any more drama of yours now,” he said with all the irritation and anger within, which was being evoked, right from the moment she had initiated the conversation. He refused to listen to anything. He had been betrayed by the same girl, he could have given up his life for. Someone who had made him fall in love and promised to love him forever but, then ditched him. He had witnessed the same girl holding someone else’s hand after him, making the same promises, which she had made to him.

Not able to take all this torture anymore, he got up, stretched his back a little and walked out of the canteen. In order to stop him from walking away, she fell down. He paused, for once, a few steps ahead of her and turned back to look at her. But he didn’t care. She got up and cleaned the dirt off her dress.

Further down the corridor, as Neel hurried towards the exit, he noticed his friends sitting lethargically at the table with their eyes wide, eavesdropping.

He moved on and heard footsteps approaching him. He turned back to see Prachi running towards him. Ignoring her, he went to the water cooler, to drink water. After quenching his thirst, as he was about to throw the disposable glass into the adjacent dustbin, Prachi held his hand again.

“You were too good for me. But I had to be better to deserve your love, and what I did was the opposite. I never cared about your feeling. And when I did, it was too late. But now, after knowing the truth, it hurts,” Prachi said still holding his hand.

“You know what?” he asked, “I would stand in the middle of the crowd of unknown faces, having a conversation with people like you who shattered me, but I wouldn’t waste time with you. I’ve convinced myself that your leaving was a good decision. You left me because I deserved it,” he threw the plastic squashed glass in the dustbin, pushed her to the wall and pinned her hands with his. It was hurting her, but he didn’t care. He was fuming and the burning fire could be seen in his eyes. Clearly!

“Right now at this very moment, you are clear. See, you too think that I don’t deserve any of your forgiveness. And perhaps, you would never forgive me for the past,” she said and closed her eyes. Two guilty teardrops rolled down her cheeks, to meet as one, into the ocean of uncountable desires – her lips, before the sunset – her fading smile.

“You know what? You’re right. You deserve this,” Neel said and flashed a big smile. She looked around helplessly for a while and realized that there was nothing more left to say.

“Ah . . .” she said wiping her tears. 

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Behind the Scenes – Cocktail!

Hello everyone,

It’s been a long time since I last blogged. Where has the time gone? Time is flying. I’ve been absent from the blog and social media lately, not to mention extremely behind schedule for releasing my book. Approximately one and half years back. Writing this book has taken much longer time than I expected. I think I’m one of the laziest writer histories has ever produced. Either I write for a whole week non-stop or I don’t write for a whole month. There is no “in between.” When I completed writing the book, I felt a great sense of accomplishment and also needed some time to take my girlfriend out for a date, as she had been complaining a lot and was talking about the breakup. She’s happy now.

I hope you all would enjoy reading this book as much I enjoyed writing it. I was frustrated about how slowly my book was moving, how plotting seemed fruitless, and then I even questioned what I was writing, if it’s worth publishing at all and if anyone would enjoy it. But I’m happy the way it turned out to be in the end. Last year was one of the hardest years of my life. I’ve lost a lot in this year. I’ll talk about that in some other blog post. But now, I’m trying to get things back on track, live a healthier and more balanced life, and in doing so I’m much happier, feeling more inspired and encouraged.

Having said all that, I want to thank you, friends, family, dear readers, for being patient with me. Thank you for loving my works and for waiting for my book patiently. I do hope you like it. I’ve poured my heart and soul into it, and have been polishing it up as best as I could.

Speaking of this book, I’ve got some good news to share finally! My book will be available to you by March end! It will be available for pre-order on all the e-commerce websites (Amazon, Flipkart, Infibeam, Pustakmandi etc.).  My beta readers say I’ve written a good book. I do hope you agree and will enjoy the end product.

I’m going to be testing something new this time around with my book. I will be sending ARCs (Advanced Reader Copies) and only have a handful of spots open, so if you think you’d like to be among the first readers of the book, in exchange for your review on Amazon and Flipkart, stay updated on my social media as I’ll be announcing it soon. 

Mark your calendars. Cover of my book will be revealed on 9^th March, 8 P.M on my Instagram, Facebook wall and Twitter handle. I’ll be back here with more book updates, including synopsis reveal and excerpts from the book. So stay tuned! 

Have a lovely weekend and thank you for sticking around!

Happy Reading!

Confession Of A Flirt!

Hello everyone! This is not only my story. This is the story we see around us every day but never think of. Many of you’ll find yourself in this, in a way or another. But I think everyone has a past and it brings out a new perspective on everyone as we grow up. Sometimes good and sometimes bad. And sometimes you have to see a very new side of them you have never imagined to see. This is a true confession by a flirt. I know after reading this many of you will hate me. Maybe you will never want to see my face. But everyone is not born as a flirt. 

And every time, one should not be judged on what he is today. Sometimes he/she should be judged on what he/she was.

“Flirts are not born, they are created.”

I was standing near window sipping coffee and looking carefully through a big window of my apartment. And I could not make out anything clearly outside the window as it was dark outside. All I could listen was raindrops falling on the ground as it was raining heavily. It happens to me more and more often lately. I can't get rid of memories which come back to me flashing my past. Sometimes it seems like that just a couple days ago I was lying in the bed with a hot slim girl who had beautiful blue eyes and a figure; every guy would have died for. Trishna. I blushed little when I imagined that breathtaking, so well-known to me girl’s face, who took my first kiss and virginity away and then humiliated me on a purpose. Why surprised? Guys also blush. 

I can’t get over her. Not even in my worst of dreams. I'll never forget her kind smile she had passed on me that days, words which she was whispering with her erotic voice directly to my dumb ears, the touch of my hands which were wandering her well-crafted body or the feeling when my manhood was finally inside her. But how could I know that all of this was only a joke? How could I forget I was just a joke for her?

I still remember her those cruel words she had said to me with so much spark and hatred looking direct in my eyes, “I don't feel anything for you. You're just a pathetic kid who deserved to be left like this. You were just a bet for me. And see I have got quite lots of money.” 

And then when she was leaving, she turned around and said biting her lower lip, “But I have to admit you’re good in bed.” Then she walked away without turning back as nothing had happened. 

I remember every bit of that day. How can I forget? I still remember clearly that after those words Trishna laughed mockingly and left my house and never met me after that. Five years have passed to that incident and I still recall that I was just a bet. Was I just a toy for her to play with? I had feelings for her. I god damn loved her with every beat of my heart. She will never understand. Now I have to admit, what a slut she was!

I wiped off a single tear and headed for a bed slowly still thinking about her those last words. Her worlds still don’t let me sleep. Not even after damn five years. Isn’t enough time to forget her, to erase her memories? But why can’t I get over her? Every time I see a girl smiling at me, I think about her. Her memories come rushing back to me. I think of same matter again and again. I think I'm just a weak idiot who has never thought of revenge on his ''beloved''. How could I do anything wrong with her, despite no matter what she did to me. 

That's why I catch up by using others. I vent out my anger on random girls like she did on me. I too was just a random stranger for her. I got into random relationships. I destroy various people's relationships… Now, I just can't stand by somebody's happiness. I think this is the best revenge I can take on her. By treating other girls, the same way she had treated me. 

I hate myself for this. I only love her. But …

However, no one knows it. No one knows about me who the real I’m. For everyone, I'm just an asshole who wants to score every hot girl. Everybody knows that I pick a new prey for myself every second day as soon as I ditch a girl. I love making a list of girls I have left. I just keep adding names to it. I don’t know this way I’m creating more flirt as I am or just punishing innocents girls for no reason. But no one knows the real story behind me. I would like to tell everyone around me whoever thinks I am a jerk, an asshole with no heart. Not everyone is born as a flirt. Flirts are not born, they are created. Once I also was a guy with the honest smile and innocent heart. Once I also wanted just to be loved and to love only one. But when her words echo in my mind, a flirt within me who has no heart wakes up. I don't know how everyone can think that I just want to sleep with girls and then leaves them so cruelly without giving them any reason. Once I also was left by someone. So, Big deal? No.

It’s just that I want to get rid of unnecessary thoughts and of her memories. And I think the only way to do it is just to win and break more and more new hearts. I just love this game.

I laughed under my breath and then went to the bed. I covered myself with a blanket and again a tear came running down to my cheeks and I wiped it off.

I closed my eyes and soon dozed off. It’s time to start hunting a new girl now.

P.S – This story is totally a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are purely a product of my imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual person, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.  And this story is written in one go and even not proofread. So forgive me for the mistakes.